The Tallinn Protocol is a six-day scavenger hunt through Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania, taking place in July 2027. Starting and finishing in Tallinn, the route covers roughly 2,000 km of gravel, bog roads and border zones via Pärnu, Riga, Aukštaitija, Daugavpils and Lake Peipsi.

Each morning, you receive your objectives: abandoned Soviet infrastructure, roadside oddities, local delicacies of questionable provenance, and photographic evidence of things that should probably not be photographed. Points are awarded for completion, creativity and commitment. How you get there, and in what order, is your problem.

Read that again. Nobody wins by arriving first. Speed earns you nothing except attention from the local traffic police. The Protocol rewards the crew that finds the most, dares the most, and documents it best, not the one with the heaviest right foot. The slowest car in the field has the same odds as the fastest. Arguably better, since it breaks down in more interesting places.

A vehicle of questionable quality. Not a bad car, a car with character. Something old enough to have opinions, cheap enough that you won't cry, and stubborn enough to survive six days of Baltic gravel, washboard, potholes and the occasional bog road that the map insisted was a road.

The Protocol is unkind to suspension, paintwork and dignity. If your car is too nice to scratch, it is too nice to bring. If it starts every time without ritual, you may be over-prepared.

Beyond the car: a co-driver you can tolerate at hour nine, basic tools, a sense of humor rated for Eastern European conditions, and the ability to read a roadbook. Mechanical skill is optional but respected. Everything else can be bought at a Circle K in Latvia.

Note (1) registration requires a Google account, as will many of the systems for the event; and (2) that tickets, once issued, are non-refundable. They are, however, freely transferable up until one week before the start. Can't make it? Sell your seat to someone with worse judgment. After that, the manifest is sealed